10 Best School Of Rock Quotes

School of Rock is arguably Jack Black’s greatest movie, and Dewey Finn was a role he was seemingly born to play. The movie is well regarded for numerous reasons, including its soundtrack, its unique brand of humor, and its memorable performances. Yet, one of the greatest aspects of the film is Mike White’s brilliant, heartfelt, and often hilarious script.

The movie is filled with some remarkable one-liners and contains hilarious exchanges of dialogue, most of which come from Jack Black himself. Many of the movie’s quotes have become famous, and they absolutely deserve to be so.

10 “Hey, Hey, Hey. Ms. Dumbbum Ain’t Your Teacher Today, I Am. And I’ve Got A Headache And The Runs.”

Dewey Finn is arguably Jack Black’s greatest movie character, being immensely likable despite some rather obvious flaws. Initially, Dewey only cares about himself, and it’s fully obvious that he’s only at the school to cash a check.

This is clear from the very beginning when Dewey passes on teaching anything because he’s hungover and has both a headache and diarrhea. This is a hilarious line, but it’s brought alive by Black’s fantastic delivery.

9 “No. It Means I Was Drunk Yesterday.”

Rather than simply admitting that he has a headache and diarrhea—as if that isn’t inappropriate enough—Dewey completely admits to the children that he is hungover. Not only did he tell them that he was hungover, but he forced them to directly participate by asking them if they knew what a hangover was.

When Frankie answers that Dewey is drunk, Dewey corrects him by saying he was drunk yesterday. It’s a fantastic encapsulation of Dewey’s character; crude, belligerent, and not at all suitable to being a substitute teacher.

8 “You’re A Fat Loser And You Have Body Odor.”

To get the kids angry at The Man, Dewey asks them to blow off some steam and insult them. Two kids begin rather innocently, with Alicia playfully calling him “stupid ass” and Summer criticizing his teaching abilities. But, then Lawrence makes things a little too personal and insults Dewey’s weight and smell.

The hilarity comes not only through the blunt insults themselves, but Lawrence’s deadpan delivery. Dewey looks legitimately shocked at the outburst, but he lets it roll off his back, nonetheless.

7 “You’re Tacky And I Hate You.”

One of the greatest insults comes from the band’s stylist, Billy. After asking the children for examples of what makes them mad, Billy raises his hand answers “you.” When Dewey politely asks him to move on from the insults, Billy simply responds, “you’re tacky and I hate you.”

The funniest part about this quote is Dewey’s reaction to it. Whereas he lets the other insults go, he seems legitimately hurt and angered by this one, and he asks Billy to see him after class. It’s the rare time that Dewey actually disciplines one of the children, and it offers a rare glimpse into his insecurities.

6 “Cello, You’ve Got A Bass.”

One of the most famous quotes from the movie is also one of its most creative. While starting the band, Dewey singles out Katie and asks her to come to the front. He then asks her what instrument she was playing in music class, and she answers with the cello.

Dewey then provides one of the movie’s greatest quotes by grabbing his bass guitar, turning it sideways, and telling Katie “cello, you’ve got a bass.” It’s an amazingly creative quote, and it’s hard to imagine no one else making it before this movie was released.

5 “Actually It’s Schnayblay.”

While being introduced to the other teachers of the school, Dewey is invited to sit down by the fourth grade teacher. She asks if she is pronouncing “Schneebly” right, to which Dewey hilariously responds, “actually, it’s Schnayblay!”

The funny thing is that Dewey really has no reason for doing this. It’s likely that he wants to sound more “cultured,” falsely believing that a foreign-sounding name would earn him some respect among the other teachers. It’s also completely illogical; not only do the kids call him Mr. Schneebly, but he was introduced as “Ned Schneebly” by the principal only seconds before.

4 “Dude, I’ve Been Mooching Off You For Years.”

Dewey Finn may be a lovable goof, but he’s certainly not stupid. He has a certain amount of self-awareness, and this is evident in the movie’s opening scene.

After being admonished by Ned’s girlfriend for being lazy and not paying any rent, Dewey turns to Ned and hilariously states, “dude, I’ve been mooching off you for years and it’s never been a problem until she showed up.” Dewey is one of Richard Linklater’s most likable characters, but quotes like this are certainly effective at portraying him as more of a flawed, but undeniably funny, anti-hero.

3 “Yeah, When’s Lunch?”

The entire sequence with Dewey arriving at the school is filled with memorable lines and interactions. After being introduced to the children, Dewey is asked by Principal Mullins if he has any questions. Without hesitation, he turns to her and asks, “yeah, when’s lunch?,” his priorities being evidently obvious.

Aside from Jack Black’s great delivery of the line, the funniest part of this is Mullins’s reaction. She can only grimace in disappointment, a slew of questions—and maybe even regret—flashing across her face in the span of a second.

2 “You Three… Groupies.”

Dewey finally comes alive as a teacher once the band gets off the ground. He assigns everyone important roles before lastly coming to three young girls, with one of them being class leader, Summer. Not knowing what to do with them, Dewey makes them the band’s “groupies” and tries to make it sound better by telling them they’ll be naming the band.

There’s just something inappropriately hilarious about a grown man assigning three ten-year-old girls to be band groupies. Of course, this only backfires when Summer does some research and leverages herself a better position through coercion.

1 “And Therefore, E=MC².”

School of Rock is a great fish out of water comedy film, and it derives some great material from Dewey Finn pretending to be a teacher. Mullins interrupts one of the music lessons, and, just as she is emerging through the door, Dewey is falsely and comedically wrapping up a lesson on mass-energy equivalence. It’s hysterical to think of someone teaching a group of ten-year-old children about mass-energy equivalence, and even more so by a teacher as goofy as Mr. Schneebly.

About The Author

Nathan Sharp
(852 Articles Published)

Nathan Sharp is a writer from outside Toronto, Ontario. He has a love of movies and television, having enjoyed them for more than twenty years. His preferences include drama, action, and horror, with the former being a particular point of interest and fascination.

He also has a love of video games, particularly those of Rockstar.

Whether it be about film, television, or video games, Nathan loves a good discussion and has written hundreds of articles for Screen Rant.

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