Family Guy Characters Ranked From Least-Most Likely To Win Squid Game

Most of the Family Guy characters wouldn’t stand the slightest chance in Squid Game; they would not take it seriously or not have the intelligence or physical prowess to get through many rounds at all. Although they would no doubt provide fans with a lot of laughs in the process, their lives in Quahog would simply not have equipped them for the brutality of Squid Game.

However, there are a few characters in the series who would be obvious front-runners in Squid Game, and one or two might even go so far as to enjoy the sadistic nature of the games. But who would come out on top?

10 Mayor Adam West

While Mayor West is one of Family Guy‘s best newer characters and provides a lot of laughs, the laughs are often because he is so ill-equipped to be in any kind of powerful, decision-making role. He frequently has no idea what is going on, how things work or how to behave in different situations.

While Mayor West would not be afraid of being in Squid Game (because he would be completely clueless as to the nature of the games), he certainly would not do well. He would be eliminated pretty much as quickly as can be – in Red Light, Green Light.

9 Meg Griffin

Poor Meg really has a bad lot in life. Although she is overall well-meaning and kind, she is forever the butt of jokes and is never taken seriously. While she is probably one of the most capable characters in Family Guy, she would be as much of a target in Squid Game as she is in Family Guy.

Meg would no doubt be taken out by her own father, Peter Griffin, who likes to bully her. He would most likely have her eliminated at the first opportunity, pushing her from behind in Red Light, Green Light as a ‘joke’.

8 Peter Griffin

Although Peter is arrogant, outspoken and can be extremely rude, the other characters of Family Guy (apart from Meg) seem to find him charming, so he would probably find himself with quite a lot of allies in Squid Game. Nevertheless, Peter Griffin’s short-fuse and reckless impulsivity, as seen in Family Guy, would be his downfall.

With Buzz Killington in the games, Peter would almost certainly intentionally eliminate himself by breaking his own honeycomb in the second round, rather than listening to one of Buzz Killington’s stories.

7 Buzz Killington

Buzz Killington is certainly a fan-favorite character on Family Guy, however, all the other characters hate him because, of course, he is forever ruining their fun and being a “buzzkill.”

Having made himself a target, this character would definitely find himself being eliminated by one of the other players, rather than losing a game. He would probably be taken out pretty early – most likely be in the fight in the dorm, having made himself a target by boring his fellow contestants.

6 Cleveland Brown

While Cleveland can be a little slow at understanding things, he is one of the most “normal” or realistic characters in Family Guy, as well as one of the funniest. While Cleveland has very low levels of enthusiasm for things, his background as a minor league baseball player would give him some athletic advantage.

However, because of one long-running joke on Family Guy, there is only one way Cleveland could go out – falling off the ledge in the Tug of War round yelling “No! No! No! No! No! No!” just like always (but probably minus the bath).

5 Chris Griffin

As one of the least intelligent and least athletic characters in Family Guy, fans might assume Chris would be eliminated very early on. However, Chris is underestimated – he would understand the games (enough) and would not be an obvious target for other competitors. Although he wouldn’t excel in the games, he would slip under the radar for the first couple of rounds.

However, Chris’s low IQ and naivety would catch up to him in the Marbles round and he would be tricked into giving his marbles away, much like Abdul Ali.

4 Glen Quagmire

As one of the most competent characters of Family Guy, Quagmire would get quite far in Squid Game. His high level of intelligence and logical disposition would have him playing strategically and tactically, no doubt being a frontrunner in most rounds.

However, Quagmire’s perverted behavior would (unsurprisingly) be his downfall. He would get distracted by watching the female contestants on the Glass Hopscotch, instead of concentrating on remembering which option is sturdy. No doubt he would lose track, pick the wrong option and get eliminated in the round.

3 Brian Griffin

As one of the most intelligent characters on the series (and a dog), Brian would be speeding ahead in Red Light, Green Light, picking a simpler shape in the Honeycomb Shapes round and implementing strategy in the Tug of War. He would probably see the games as sadistic and cruel, but at the same time his competitive streak would have Brian wanting to win (and to beat Family Guy‘s Stewie).

However, Brian’s unrequited love for Lois would be the reason for his elimination. He would, no doubt, volunteer to go ahead of Lois in the Glass Hopscotch round to keep her safe, giving him no chance of making it through the round.

2 Lois Griffin

As well as being one of the funniest characters on Family Guy, Lois’s capable and reasonable disposition would no doubt serve her well in Squid Game. Her likable nature and tendency to make friends means she would receive protection from her allies and none of her competitors would want to see her eliminated.

However, upon making it to the final round of Squid Game, Lois would naively think that she would not be made to fight her baby and so would assume they had won together. Of course, she would be wrong.

1 Stewie Griffin

Stewie would be the absolute frontrunner throughout the games. As a baby, he would be underestimated, but he would have the highest level of intelligence and the most competitive nature of all the contestants. In fact, fans wouldn’t be surprised if he was the evil genius behind the games that had chosen to take part, much like Oh Il-Nam.

Making it to the final round with Lois would, no doubt, have been part of his master plan, giving him the opportunity of achieving his long-term goal of taking her out once and for all.