The Big Bang Theory: 9 Reasons Raj & Emily Were Doomed From The Start

Relationship troubles were a recurring theme in The Big Bang Theory, mostly because the characters weren’t very sociable at first. If it wasn’t the struggle of finding a romantic partner, it was the trouble keeping them long term. In any case, it was entertaining for the fans who’d invest in the relationships or call them out as most likely to end within a couple of episodes.

Of all the characters, Raj struggled the most when it came to matters of the heart, even though he was one of the few with the most romantic potential. In pursuit of a happily-ever-after like those in the romcoms he was obsessed with, he dated several women throughout the 12-season run of the show. One of those was Emily Sweeney, a dermatologist with a love for the creepy and gory. Although fans hoped for a happily-ever-after for Raj and Emily, there were a lot of red flags that left fans feeling the relationship was doomed from the once-upon-a-time.

9 Different Interests

It wasn’t obvious at first, but Emily and Raj liked very different things. He loved cheers and frills and she was obsessed with chills and thrills. When she wanted them to watch a gory movie, he had to do a trial-watch with Howard so he wouldn’t freak out as much in front of her, but by the end of the movie, it had him questioning what it meant that she liked something he found so disturbing. When he asked her, she told him movies like that turned her on and he happily played it after that in the hopes of getting intimate.

That was a recurring thing in their relationship too, like the time she suggested being intimate in a graveyard and he freaked out and thought of breaking up with her. He chickened out, though, because he didn’t want to be alone, but it was clear that it was only a matter of time before he eventually cracked and called it quits.

8 Bad First Impressions

Raj found Emily through a dating website in season 7’s “The Friendship Turbulence,” but because he was nervous he’d screw it up, he asked Amy to talk to Emily on his behalf. Amy agreed and she and Emily got along well and met in person. Raj showed up to the meeting and Emily was put off by his intrusive behavior and the fact that he had to send his friend to do his courting for him.

They met a few episodes later again and hit it off the second time around. But as most fans realized, the insecure, shy Raj that Emily had seen the first time was basically the everyday Raj. And if that put her off then, it was likely going to be an issue later, and—as it turns out—it was.

7 Rocky Start With Penny

When Emily and Raj got together and he told his friends that he wanted to introduce them to her, Sheldon was quick to serve up one of his infamous facts that a person was likely to lose friends when they got into a new relationship. Although everyone else ridiculed him for that, he was actually almost right.

After introducing Emily, Penny noticed she was giving her a cold attitude and Emily later admitted that it was because Raj had told her about the night they got drunk and ended up in bed together. Although they didn’t go all the way, it made her jealous, especially when she saw how pretty Penny was. Raj’s friends were important to him and any partner who didn’t get along with them wasn’t likely to last very long.

6 Raj Didn’t Really Love Her

Spanning 4 seasons, this was one of the longest relationships Raj had, but unfortunately not the most loving. Raj was uncomfortable through most of it and Emily seemed oblivious that she made him feel that way. She constantly made remarks about murder and dead bodies disguised as jokes, even after Raj expressed concerns about it.

At first, he said she was “scary but a cute scary,” but later complained about it to Howard and Bernadette. He didn’t have the courage to break it off with her as it would mean he’d be alone, but the moment he met Claire, he was ready to drop her like a hot potato. If he really loved her, leaving her wouldn’t have been that easy for him.

5 She Had History With Howard

The double date Raj set up with Howard and Bernadette to introduce them to Emily didn’t quite go as expected. During the dinner, Emily remembered that she and Howard had been set up on a date a while back and he’d clogged up the bathroom in her apartment and run away. Raj and Emily spent the rest of the night making fun of Howard for it.

As Howard was Raj’s best friend, any friction between him and anyone Raj was seeing was bound to affect both relationships. Sure enough, whenever Raj had issues with Emily, he complained to Howard who always advised him to end the relationship. It was only a matter of time until he gave in and did it.

4 Communication Issues

The key to any successful relationship is communication and right off the bat, Raj and Emily’s communication skills were a little worrying. They both tried to be transparent with each other, as Raj told Emily when Lucy (his ex) contacted him and Emily eventually told him about the tattoo guy he’d seen her on a date with and that it was a once-off thing.

Other than that, their communication wasn’t so great. He wasn’t completely open with her about things that made him uncomfortable and she clearly wasn’t honest with him about things she didn’t like about him.

3 His History With Women

Raj’s difficulties interacting with women were a long-running gag of the show, right from the pilot episode. It was often the reason why his relationships didn’t work out, especially when his selective mutism was still so bad he needed alcohol just to be able to talk to a woman. Although he eventually overcame it, his dynamic with women (apart from Penny, Amy, and Bernadette), wasn’t so good.

This was one of the reasons why his relationship with Emily seemed doomed from the start. He was nervous about meeting her and asked Amy to instead. Even though, eventually, he and Emily interacted more, that initial nervousness around her carried into their relationship, leaving him to hide feelings of discomfort, which eventually led to their breakup.

2 Keeping Secrets

Sometime after Emily and Raj got together, Raj bumped into her at the movies where she was on a date with another guy. He was crushed but later realized that they hadn’t had the exclusivity talk so it wasn’t fair for him to assume that they were. He said as much to her when they met up later and she told him that she only went on a date with the guy he’d seen to get him off her back.

Although it was straightened out in a short time, the two of them continued to keep secrets from each other. For example, Raj hiding his true feelings about the things Emily loved and secretly dating Claire while he was still with Emily.

1 Different Characters

Opposites attract, and while that’s true for some, for Raj and Emily it spelled disaster. The two had a few things in common like their scientific background, but everything else about them was different. Emily was adventurous, daring, and a little bloodthirsty while Raj had a more fantastical point of view on life, love, and everything in general.

Their differences were bound to come in the way of their relationship, and they eventually did. During the ex-girlfriend focus group in “The Emotion Detection Automation,” Emily pointed out that their relationship did not last long because he was such a mama’s boy, whereas she preferred men who were independent, like her.

About The Author

Tricia Mawire
(172 Articles Published)

Tricia is a List Writer for Screen Rant with a background in creative writing and a love for all things film and TV. She fell in love with reading at the age of 10 after discovering that her favorite movie, Matilda, was based on a novel. That led to her first in-depth analysis of literary work to her mom and anyone who’d listen. If she’s not reading or writing stories with crazy plot twists, she’s bingeing a new series and ranting about character arcs and plot holes. Or she’s eating French fries.

More From Tricia Mawire