The Righteous Gemstones: The Main Characters, Ranked By Intelligence

Season 2 of HBO’s hit comedy, The Righteous Gemstones is currently running, and the Gemstones find themselves surrounded by scandal and blackmail once more. Unfortunately, like in its first season, the problems that threaten their megachurch empire are often the product of their own foolishness.

Yet, that’s where a lot of the humor comes from in this show – many of the characters genuinely believe they are the smartest person in the room, and they often aren’t. From the likes of Eli, Jesse, Judy, Kelvin, Baby Billy, and more, the competition for the smartest is fierce.

10 Keefe Chambers

Keefe has the innocence and ignorance of a baby. He’s defined not by his intelligence, but rather his lack thereof, along with his utter devotion to his messiah, Kelvin. He did have one high point early in season 1, helping the Gemstones by tracking Scotty’s van through DMV cameras – but that’s about it.

Since then, his folly and dumbness have forced him into hilarious and compromising circumstances. He’s forgotten to put on pants on a few occasions, made a myriad of stupid comments, and most recently, tried and failed to sneak Kelvin’s “God Squad” into BJ’s easily-accessible baptism party. Nevertheless, his soft-spoken demeanor, natural vacancy, and authenticity have made him a fan favorite and one of The Righteous Gemstones‘ most likable characters.

9 BJ Barnes

Despite being a seemingly good-hearted person, BJ finds himself among vipers with the Gemstones. He’s often the butt of the joke due to his inherently quirky nature – but then he makes himself even easier prey whenever he decides to speak. BJ works as an optician, but he does not have the foresight to know when to speak and when not to among the family.

Any comment he makes is often relatively random and irrelevant, giving Jesse, Kelvin, and even his wife, Judy, ample opportunity to pounce and torment him. However, he is eager to learn and gain the respect of his family, like recently when he was baptized into the church.

8 Judy Gemstone

What Judy might lack in actual intelligence, she assuredly makes up for in passion. She’s the often-sadistic middle child and Eli’s only daughter with a severe lack of impulse control. As a result, she is responsible for some of the funniest quotes throughout The Righteous Gemstones. She will say anything and everything that pops into her mind, and it’s usually crude, merciless, unfounded, and deeply funny.

Judy is smart and capable in her own right, but she suffers from a serious lack of contextual intelligence. She often misreads even the simplest situations and relationships to drastic extremes. In fact, she recently misconstrued Eli and Junior’s friendship – describing in great and graphic detail how she thought they were having sex.

7 Kelvin Gemstone

While Kelvin Gemstone is not dumb, he is definitely not the smartest in the bunch. The youth minister struggles with being the youngest and wanting to impress his father. He is desperate to triumph in Eli’s eyes and is always trying to one-up his siblings. Despite this, he does possess some specific knowledge – knowing social optics, the basics of some languages, and how to motivate children – but it is rarely practical.

It doesn’t help that his juvenile, impulsive nature consistently gets him in trouble – like when he stupidly tackled his father, resulting in broken thumbs. In the end, Kelvin is more about maintaining an appearance of intelligence and importance, rather than actually having or using any.

6 Amber Gemstone

While her husband vies for his father’s throne, Amber is a clear successor to Aimee-Leigh’s role as the matriarch – don’t tell Judy, though! Amber is an influential figure among the wives of the church, carrying herself with the poise and strength that demands attention and respect. She is clearly smart and knowledgeable about the business.

However, for most of season 1, it seemed like she wanted to remain blissfully oblivious to Jesse’s darker action – at least until she could no longer ignore it. Her trajectory so far in season 2 – with a potential partnership with the Lissons to build a Christian’s resort called Zion’s Landing – could see her rise in the ranks.

5 Baby Billy Freeman

Baby Billy is quite possibly the most opportunistic character in the bunch, but certainly not the smartest. He is clever, a textbook gaslighter – knowing how to easily manipulate others. A highlight is in “Interlude” (S1, Ep5) when he persuaded a young Jesse to humiliate himself and his family in retaliation against Eli and Aimee-Leigh.

However, his nearly fatal flaw is thinking his gimmicks are infallible. Particularly, he fully expected to get away with stealing the Gemstone’s money and, therefore, ignored numerous obvious clues that would prove his culpability: the missing Jesus figurine; the fact that someone would’ve discovered the van regardless of whether it was low tide or not; and the immediate, extravagant and attention-grabbing purchases.

4 Jesse Gemstone

Danny McBride adds another outrageous character to his impressive ledger with the eldest son and self-determined heir to the Gemstone empire, Jesse Gemstone. He’s definitely the smartest of his siblings, but the same cannot be said though when compared to his parents and even his own son. Though he claims “can’t get nothing past me” he is too egotistical and complacent to deduce what is actually happening around him.

Throughout season 1, Jesse was often the one coming up with plans to deliver himself from the evils he’s unwittingly created. He continually guessed incorrectly, yet so confidently, who the culprit was. Like his siblings, he blurts out nearly anything in his head, though his points are usually relevant. Because of all this, his plans were destined to fail.

3 Aimee-Leigh Gemstone

Aimee-Leigh is a central figure to this series, yet she only appears through flashbacks in a few episodes. Nevertheless, she proves how vital and respected she was in the Gemstone family before her death, and not just because of her stellar vocals.

Her intelligence comes from her deep understanding of the people that surround her, especially Eli and Baby Billy. She is easily able to see through her loving husband or cunning brother. Although she is not always entirely successful, she also knows to persuade them towards the path of righteousness. There could be truth to Eli’s thoughts that they would be in a better place were she still alive to guide them.

2 Gideon Gemstone

Gideon – though not one of The Righteous Gemstones‘ funniest characters – is, without doubt, one of the smartest. He certainly exhibited his intelligence and aptitude throughout season 1 while blackmailing his father, the plans for which he created all by himself. Particularly, he implanted himself back in Gemstone Ministries, shadowing Martin Imari – gathering first-hand knowledge of where the money is and how best to steal it. Although he eventually got cold feet, these plans would’ve proved successful.

His major misstep came in aligning himself with Scotty, whose manic behavior consistently complicated the heist. Despite this, he is still one of the brighter characters – knowing now how to avoid trouble so far in season 2 while properly channeling his skills as a church videographer.

1 Eli Gemstone

There would be no Gemstone Ministries, no sprawling manors or massive fortune if not for Eli Gemstone, played by John Goodman. He rules family and company alike with an iron fist, and the respect he is owed is due in large part to his impressive intellect. Eli knows his industry’s ins and outs, how to lead and maintain his authority, and particularly what his family is capable of, or rather, not capable of.

Unfortunately, he is plagued by mistrust – although this is not unwarranted as shown by his children’s actions and behavior. Nevertheless, among a cast of characters constantly fumbling and overcomplicating their lives, he is still clearly one of the most adept and smartest.

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